Master Tholnauer, an alchemist by trade, is used to submitting his art to the service of the nobility, for which he is well paid. He is also used to serving the nobility’s more exotic needs with discretion, enhancing the natural endowments of a lord or lady with his magical black paint. For this, he is paid very well. However, he is not used to remaining after his artistry is done, and assisting lusty noble ladies quite this directly. (F/M, F/F, F/F/M)
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She rose to her feet. “Then you are indeed in the correct room. Did you bring the magic paint?”
“Yes, I did. Everything is here.” I swung my satchel down onto the floor. Finding two women waiting for me wasn’t unusual, but finding them in such an unromantic mood was quite out of the ordinary. “What can I do for you?”
“Why, paint, of course.”
“Well, I assumed as much by the note you sent summoning me here. Anything in particular? Or is this an ‘artist’s choice’ situation?”
“One is made to understand that this paint is capable of endowing one with…” She pursed her lips, clearly searching for words. “…A functioning male member?”
“Yes, it is.” There was something funny going on, but I couldn’t figure out what it was.
“Then that is the task I wish you to perform.”
I was definitely missing information. Unfortunately, my business reputation depended on a distinct lack of curiosity, so I shrugged and sat down at a nearby dressing table to unpack my kit. “Any particular preferences?” I asked.
“How big, for example? Normal, well-endowed….”
“Big,” said the brunette.
“Are you sure?” said the blonde woman still sitting on the bed. She had a small voice, and spoke with a bit of trepidation.
“There must be no question,” said the brunette. The brunette turned back to me. “Big. Not so big that it will not… erm… fit.” She shrugged out of her robe, revealing a body typical of the noble men and women I was used to working on: not quite fat, as such, but soft and round, typical of a life with little in the way of heavy manual labor.
“Ah, we will need to address one detail before we go much further,” I said, waving my hand to indicate her midsection. “You’ve got rather a lot of pubic hair there, and the paint will not peel off easily with that in place. I have a preparation which can remove it.”
She gave me a sigh and shook her head. “Do what you need to do, Mister Tholnauer.”
“Of course.” I picked up a pot and undid the lid for her. Holding it out, I made a gesture with my fingers to demonstrate. “Just take enough to cover three fingers, and—”
“Really, Mister Tholnauer. One might think you were not the hired help in this situation.”
“Of course. My apologies. If milady would widen her stance a bit….”